The countdown to the start of the 2020-2021 school year has begun. Classes are finalized and last minute shopping sprees have started. Everyone is excited about moving back in with their friends and picking up where they left off last spring. However, as an incoming first-year student joining the Wolfpack community during COVID-19, this last week leading up to the first day of class is a time filled with excitement, anticipation and a whole lot of anxiety. 

If you would have asked me back in March if this day was going to come, I probably would’ve laughed. At that point, everything was being taken away from me. I had lost my senior year. I was being kept from my best friends. The gym I worked at was shut down, and my older sister had come home for spring break only to never go back. Back then, leaving for college seemed like a pipe dream. Now, my dining room is filled with dorm necessities, and my textbooks are bought. I am moving onto campus in six days, and it’s beginning to feel real. 

My heart is about to burst out of my chest from excitement because I finally get to go back to school and begin my life again. Like every other first-year, I am beyond excited to have the chance to spread my wings and explore who I am. I am looking forward to being on my own and getting into a little bit of trouble. The fact that leaving home for the first year of college wasn’t guaranteed makes me so much more grateful that this is actually happening. I am honestly a little overwhelmed and shocked that I am actually getting this opportunity after seeing everything I have lost out on over the past few months. 

With the happiness, excitement and gratitude comes anxiety and uncertainty. Moving away from home for the first time would give anyone at least a little anxiety, but moving into college during a global pandemic brings its own set of uncertainties and fears. With everything online, am I going to be able to make friends? Is leaving home right now the safest decision? For me, personally, most of the anxiety of starting the 2020-2021 school year stems from the fact that I am about to move into a glorified petri dish. 

Moving into a dorm for the first time already comes with all its normal anxieties. What if I miss home? Will my roommate and I get along? How the heck am I going to fit all my things into that tiny space? Leaving home for the first time and moving in with a stranger is a scary enough experience to begin with, but as a first-year during COVID-19, I am also currently dealing with anxieties about how to not catch the virus while moving into close quarters with a bunch of strangers. 

The fear of contracting COVID-19 makes going away to college for the first time a much scarier feat. Add on the fact that I am already missing my dog and sad about leaving my friends behind, the last week leading up to the first day of class is an emotional roller coaster of fear, sadness, anticipation and full-hearted excitement.

The truth is going away to college for the first time is always scary and emotional, but what big change isn’t? That doesn’t stop me from being filled with happiness and anticipation over the fact that, in six days, I am moving into my new home, and 10 days from now, my new life will finally begin. My heart is literally ready to burst out of my chest from the excitement, fear and anticipation of starting college, and now that the countdown to the first day of class is real, I am definitely freaking out, but I’m ready for it. I am ready to face the world and discover who I am. NC State, here I come!