For women, it often feels like every step you take is on a ground paved for men, by men. When you look around, it’s hard to ignore that the world wasn’t built with you in mind.
There are many moments of not-so-subtle realization surrounding the extent to which we live in a man’s world. Female fashion brands are predominantly male-owned. The shows and movies made to depict your experiences are made by men who have never had them. And in a world of space exploration and artificial intelligence, a cotton ball filled with arsenic is the standard for female hygiene.
As such, dependable spaces where women can safely exist in the majority are crucial to developing a meaningful community that we can rely on for support and advice.
Nail and hair salons are one of the most staple examples of women’s spaces. They are reliable, female-dominated spaces that provide meaningful conversation, long-term friendships and common ground for women of all backgrounds.
My mother, sister and I have all been seeing the same hair stylist for years. Getting my hair done with her is more than routine; it’s a tradition that my mom started and has passed down to another generation. When I see her, we trade stories and life advice and I leave feeling beautiful for much more than just my hair.
In Raleigh, Phantastic Nails & Spa is another space that wholeheartedly embraces the pursuit of maintaining a safe and community-oriented environment. Each appointment comes with genuine conversation, shared experiences and fabulous nails.
Thao Phan, a cofounder of Phantastic Nails, explained how supporting and listening to women is an essential part of her work.
“I’ve done this for many years in different settings,” Phan said. “But what stays the same is that women will confide in you as you build a relationship. They become family. We laugh together, we cry together. We need these open spaces.”
Nail and hair appointments are often booked regularly, which allows a sense of stability for women experiencing a difficult time. It provides a scheduled time to engage closely with people who care about you, which sometimes feels daunting to seek out otherwise.
“People have shared their stories with me,” Phan said. “I feel empathy when I touch their hands. I feel some of their sadness transfer.”
Above all else, a space such as Phantastic Nails invites women to be authentic to anything they are feeling. Every emotion, from joy to grief, is equally welcomed by people who want to listen.
“I hope people feel comfortable to come as they are,” Phan said. “That’s the biggest thing. We have clients of all kinds of backgrounds and sexualities, and I treat them all the same because they are all decent everyday people.”
It’s hard to grapple with the way the world is systematically stacked against women. It often feels perpetual, with any slight progress rapidly followed by three steps backward.
However, spaces such as Phantastic Nails remind me of all the things about women that inspire me the most. I listened, laughed and had one of the most candid conversations of my life with women who had been strangers mere minutes prior.
For all people, not just women, it is so important to seek experiences that make you appreciate the strength and impact of the women around you. As such, be intentional about supporting businesses that align with building a positive, accepting and steadfast community.
Phantastic Nails & Spa is located off of Duraleigh Road in Raleigh. For more information, you can visit their website or Instagram, @phantasticnails_.
