In the last few decades, we have seen Valentine’s Day — a traditionally religious holiday — take a turn for the worse. Not only has it become commercialized, but it has also evolved into nothing more than a performance. Many couples use it purely as an excuse to showcase their seemingly ever-so-perfect relationship when, in reality, it’s not all roses.
To be clear, I am not a bitter single here to moan and complain about Valentine’s Day, but it’s true — the holiday is not celebrated how it should be. It’s more of a promotional strategy for businesses and couples than a day to truly celebrate love.
Something that often goes overlooked is the surprising origins of Valentine’s Day, as most people don’t know why we celebrate. The holiday originated as a feast to celebrate the martyrdom of two saints, both named Valentine, who were executed on Feb. 14.
Many historians also believe Valentine’s Day can be tied to the ancient Roman festival of Lupercalia, which celebrated the coming of spring annually on Feb. 15. Lupercalia was a pagan festival involving animal sacrifice, random coupling and violent rituals, including the random whippings of women. This sexually-charged festival was eliminated by Pope Gelasius I in the fifth century and replaced by a day to celebrate the martyrdom of St. Valentine.
In today’s world, the festival and saints are rarely associated with Valentine’s Day. Instead, we associate the holiday with romance and relationships, which is only loosely tied to its origins.
In addition to overlooking most of the religious meaning, we’ve also taken some of its romantic meaning away by making the holiday about material gifts and a false sense of perfection.
Valentine’s Day has transformed from a personal celebration of love to a day dominated by consumerism. Overpriced flowers, chocolates and jewelry — is that really what love is made of? The holiday seems more like an obligation than a true expression of affection.
What was once a celebration of love has now turned into an annual retail frenzy.
This is a common theme with holidays. I mean, take a look at Christmas. It’s one of the most commercialized holidays out there, seemingly more about purchasing gifts and putting them under a tree than celebrating one of the most important events within the Christian faith.
Moreover, the presence of social media has turned Valentine’s Day into a way to promote relationships; it’s a PR stunt that ultimately sets unrealistic expectations for romance.
Social media posts often show lavish dates, expensive gifts and perfect smiles, but in many instances, this is a false representation. Your relationship doesn’t have to fit into that narrative because the reality is that most relationships don’t.
Valentine’s Day should be a happy occasion, but societal expectations create unnecessary anxiety and pressure for couples, not to mention how excessive posting exacerbates the loneliness many singles already feel.
The constant comparison to what others post online can distort the true meaning of companionships. When relationships are reduced to pictures and likes, the deeper emotional connection that makes them special is overlooked. Valentine’s Day should focus on meaningful moments, not on curating the perfect image to show the world.
The essence of Valentine’s Day is genius; it’s a day to celebrate the people you love. However, it’s important that we keep it authentic.
Valentine’s Day doesn’t need to be a public declaration. It should be a sincere expression of love towards the people you care about. It’s not about outdoing others or keeping up with trends. It’s about appreciating the people who matter most.
