Editor’s Note: This is a work of satire. It should not be taken seriously or applied literally.

Dressing as Flynn Rider and Rapunzel or Monica and Chandler for Halloween just isn’t cutting it anymore — these classic costumes are overrated. Couples need to get creative and think outside the box. In the following sections, you, dear reader, will find several underground couples’ costumes that will also make your friends jealous.

A wolf and a construction worker:

Nothing says “Go Pack!” like navigating the obstacle course of construction and hazards on your way to class. Who needs a straight shot to your 8:30 a.m., when you could be working on your stamina on the way there?

You’re already shelling out thousands to be here, so why not give back by grabbing a hard hat and diving into this endless loop of breaking down the campus and building it back up? Tuffy may huff and puff and blow our brick houses down, but doesn’t it warm your heart to know that we’ll always be here, picking up the pieces brick by brick?

Just as the Wolfpack seems to have an unhealthy attachment to constant renovation, you can show your constant dedication to “fixing” your situationship this Halloween in this couples’ costume. No matter how many bricks we tear down and rebuild, we’ll still be dodging potholes and red flags by the spring.

A football player and a Butterfinger bar:

We love you NC State football, and this costume is entirely unrelated to the fact that the band is the best part of our gameday. Or the fact that we haven’t won 10 games in a season since 2002. Or the fact that the team managed 15 fumbles so far this season and lost nine. We promise.

While our relationship with football might be toxic, your love affair hopefully isn’t. So suit up, and let it serve as a tribute to your relationship’s resilience and your readiness for whatever curveball — or fumble — comes your way.

Remember: Even if it looks like your relationship is about to head straight into overtime, there’s always a stressful game to take your mind off of it. If it’s not one thing disappointing you, it’s another, win or lose.

On the bright side, for some of you, being busy yelling at your TV means you don’t have time to focus on the fact that your relationship is falling apart. We know you’ll never stop watching, even when you say you give up. Just like you’ll never put that relationship out of its misery.

A PCB and Poe Hall:

Of course, we didn’t forget about the hottest topic on campus. As a tribute, everyone should know how thrilled you are to have sat in those classrooms for several years. Breathing plain oxygen is clearly not something Generation Z likes to do anyway.

And for all the couples out there who might relate a little too well to this toxic, occasionally suffocating energy — yeah, we see you.

Embrace your love-hate relationship with this campus classic. Because, just like your situationship, some things are just destined to keep you hot and bothered.

As NC State students, we have so many great options to choose from. Whether you’ve been here through the struggles of our football team or started amidst the rubble of the Brickyard, there’s something for everyone.

So, there you have it — some of the best couples’ costumes for you and your boo to match this Halloweekend. Sure, you’ll probably look back at pictures of these one day and cringe, but isn’t that the beauty of it? After all, nothing says “‘til death do us part” like a wolf and a construction worker.

So go forth, make memories and may your couples’ costumes be only mildly regrettable — but not as regrettable as the way you’ll feel the next day.