Will Lamarche headshot
A few nights ago I sent off two emails. The first explaining to my physical education professor that I would be dropping the class after a medical issue arose, the second explaining to the coordinator of my internship group that I couldn’t commit to the position.
I felt guilty — like I had failed my professor, my coordinator and above all myself. I hadn’t though. Quitting is not conceding; it’s admitting that your efforts need to be placed somewhere else, and that’s okay.
There is a lot of guilt attached to telling someone you will no longer be continuing with an endeavor. It’s an ugly feeling that leaves one thinking they’ve failed.
Part of this is because we live in a success-driven culture. Everything from our grading system to building a resume tells us we need to keep trying at something until we succeed. But as we become adults, it’s important to realize that sometimes we ought to walk away.
In that same vein, we only have so much time to do everything we need and want to do. When I joined my internship I knew it would be six to ten hours a week. However, after the first week of classes compounded with clubs, I realized that I would be stretched too thin in a couple of months.
My priorities as a student are to graduate on time and build writing and editing skills. My internship — as amazing as it would have looked on my resume — would take me away from that.
And I want to emphasize, it was not that simple of a dialogue for me.
I wanted to believe that I could persevere and finish the semester feeling accomplished, especially in regards to my internship.
My outlook changed after I ran into a medical issue. While it was nothing serious, it could have been exacerbated by taking a physical education class. It then made more sense to me why I needed to drop the class and internship. Like muscles, when we’re exhausted and overworked, we never properly rest. We just scrape by.
As college students, it is especially important that we take care of ourselves in regards to our commitments. It can often feel like we’re being pulled in so many different directions, so making time for yourself to relax and destress is essential.
It is important to mention that quitting is a privilege. Not all of us have the option to let go of commitments without risking graduation plans or financial stability. Still, simply thinking about the idea of quitting can help you explore alternatives and see if other options are plausible for you.
Sometimes we aren’t the best equipped for certain opportunities. For my internship, there were far too many people on my team for me to get the one-on-one experience I was told I would have. By no means was it a bad internship, it just wasn’t for me. If an opportunity can’t provide much to you, then it may not be much of an opportunity to begin with.
That’s not to say that you can’t find other value in it, but if you’re still searching for it at the expense of other priorities, it may be time to move on.
Ironically enough, quitting is a skill. It can feel wrong to shut yourself off from something, but sometimes it’s about prioritizing yourself and what you really need. There will be gym classes and internships in semesters to come, but there’s only one you.
It can feel bad to quit — it feels like giving up, but it’s not. It’s saying “maybe doing this thing isn’t the most beneficial for me right now,” and that’s self-care.