I’ve always been a fan of Pink Floyd. Growing up with a guitar-slinging dad, the band’s music was a great influence on my life, so it was only natural for me to buy a T-shirt with their name. As it turned out, those fond memories wouldn’t be a good enough reason to wear it — unless I had something else to prove.

From the moment he opened his mouth, I knew I was in trouble. What started as an amicable remark about my shirt from a stranger turned quickly into a test of my worthiness as a fan: “What’s your favorite album besides ‘Dark Side of the Moon?’” I was taken aback; in all honesty, I wasn’t knowledgeable about Pink Floyd albums, only certain songs. Thus, I failed to rise to the occasion and defend my honor as a fan, but I really shouldn’t have had to.

Practically anyone who’s a music fan has experienced this kind of gatekeeping at some point. If not, you’ve probably heard or seen the memes. To that end, I’m sure we all relate to the frustration that comes with gatekeeping, and the desire to avoid it as much as possible.

To be fair, my experience was a fairly innocent interaction. And sure, this type of behavior is relatively harmless in the grand scheme of things — it may even help to connect avid fans. However, it’s unnecessary and annoying for several reasons.

First off, gatekeeping is inherently exclusionary. When you attempt to weed out casual listeners from the devoted ones, you imply that someone can only be worthy of the label “fan” if they’re able to meet a certain threshold. Whether that’s preferring niche songs over more mainstream ones or knowing the true meaning behind ambiguous lyrics, there are a slew of arbitrary boxes one must check off in order to be considered among the top ranks.

Failure to do so can be more than just embarrassing — it can also hurt your mental health. Because we are social creatures, we all need a sense of belonging to thrive. However, gatekeeping essentially bars access to a community and its benefits, which lends itself to lower self-esteem, increased anger and anxiety.

In a way, I see ardent fans’ frustration when someone wears their beloved artists’ merchandise for the aesthetic rather than a genuine love of the group. After all, these musicians put a great amount of effort and care into what they produce, so it only makes sense for someone that recognizes that to own their products. Yet, that logic can only take you so far.

Of all the brands and items of clothing we walk around in each day, it’s doubtful we possess a deep knowledge about each one of them. Furthermore, there are plenty of other works of art, such as TV shows, movies and street artists, whose merch we wear that don’t receive the same level of scrutiny. Essentially, if you can’t explain the extensive lore behind your “Shrek” T-shirt, then you shouldn’t expect someone wearing a Nirvana shirt to do the same.

Not only is gatekeeping unreasonable, but it’s also counterproductive. As a hard-core fan, shouldn’t you be happy that others are supporting your favorite band? In no way does excluding fans help to benefit the artists themselves. Instead, it runs the risk of turning people away from your beloved group or pushing them to hide their fan status. In fact, this is why I steer clear of certain band shirts because of the judgment I expect to come with it.

Above all, gatekeeping is dumb for one simple reason — who cares? At the end of the day, everyone should be free to live their own lives, which includes wearing what you want and listening to what you want. As long as it doesn’t hurt you, it really doesn’t matter that someone who only knows “Bohemian Rhapsody” wears a Queen shirt.

If you fall into this category of individuals, don’t worry. We’re all guilty of looking down on mainstream trends. Although we all do it to some extent, we should aim to curb it if it’s only done for the sake of establishing superiority over others. Instead of putting someone on the spot, make a genuine effort to help them feel included by complimenting their music taste. Or, if you want to avoid any chance of appearing snobby, you can just say “nice shirt.”