Disappointment is the best word I can use to describe my feelings toward the opening weekend success of “Fifty Shades of Grey.” And success is an understatement. The erotic novel-based film produced $81.7 million in just three days, setting a new record for the highest-grossing President’s Day holiday opener. There are many different opinions on the fanfiction-inspired film, but hopefully everyone can agree that certain thematic elements are undeniably disturbing and certainly should not be ignored.
Erotic films are one thing. If that is where a person’s interests lie, then by all means, watch them. Even the interests at the heart of “Fifty Shades,” BDSM, do not have to be questioned. The real problem is that this particular film encourages and parades domestic abuse while labeling it as erotic and exciting. It makes light of a real issue and twists it. The result is that many people believe the events and relationship portrayed are desirable.
Perhaps the most disturbing factor of “Fifty Shades” is that there is extreme denial that the relationship portrayed qualifies as abusive. Those involved in the film have done an excellent job of masking what is actually happening and presenting it as an ideal relationship. They have tricked many into thinking that what takes place is OK. And it isn’t. The leading male character of the film is controlling, manipulative and undeniably a stalker. Yet he has real women swooning at his “romance” and hoping to one day experience the same thing. When did mind-games and extreme masochism become attractive?
It is unfortunate that “Fifty Shades of Grey” presents a dysfunctional, abusive relationship, yet there are people out there who see the film and wish they had a similar relationship. They have been fooled into thinking that the abuse portrayed is romantic and erotic when really it is sick and saddening.
There are still people who refuse to acknowledge that “Fifty Shades of Grey” depicts domestic abuse. An argument used against this is that the female lead is willing and does not desire to leave the relationship. Willingness is quite the stretch. It is not that she is willing, but rather is submissive to a man who greatly desires to dominate her financially, physically and emotionally. This domination is taken to extreme degrees and exploited in ways that are undoubtedly abusive.
The film’s success goes to show that there is a long way to go in changing the way people think about domestic abuse. It shows that too many people are willing to make excuses and not accept when abuse is portrayed and even glorified. Painting an abusive relationship in a way that is supposed to be desirable and acceptable does an injustice to those who have experienced domestic abuse. Excuses should no longer be made for this film when there are real victims out there who may very well have experienced a similar situation. The story is not sexy, it is sick.
It is a scary thing to think that so many people are unaware of the abuse that takes place in this film and see no problem with the things that take place. Many are blindly supporting it without awareness of the message it is sending. It’s time to label “Fifty Shades of Grey” for what it really is—glorified, sexualized, domestic abuse.
