Don’t Be Mistaken About Taken

Let’s not kid ourselves, we all know about the action movie formula.  Badass Joe goes about his average badass day, buying groceries and busting skulls, until some non-badass Jims and Janes have the indecency to get themselves shot and/or kidnapped.  Badass Joe comes out guns-, fists- and, if applicable, swords-blazing to take out Evil Boss Guy and his equally Evil though slightly less badass henchmen. Badass Joe wins, Evil Boss Guy dies, everyone eats cake, blah blah roll credits blah.

And hey, I’m not complaining.  There is no genre in film that matches the unbridled joy one gets from a good Jack Bauer vs. The World-type flick where you give one person a gun, their wits and a whole lot of people to unapologetically maim.  That being said, actually finding a good action movie is about as rare in our modern world as economic stability (oh yeah, I went there), and the Sin City‘s, Bourne Supremacy‘s, Rambo IV‘s and Chronicles of Riddick‘s are a very rare breed indeed.

Which brings us to Taken, starring Liam Neeson as aged ex-CIA operative Bryan Mills who goes on a desperate and almost deranged rampage through the City of Lights to find his kidnapped daughter.  It’s a kind of mission of redemption for Mr. Mills, who at the film’s outset is trying to make up for lost time with a daughter he was never there for, and who now is a 17 year old teenager and about as emotionally unpredictable as your average Bond villain. Thankfully she’s gone for most of the movie so as to avoid the obligatory “Daddy, please save!” or “Daddy, the terrorists have a bomb to blow up Los Angeles!” or “Daddy, you have to choose between saving me or deactivating a bomb that will blow up Los Angeles!” moments.

What makes Taken so special is that it actually breaks a lot of the action movie conventions without losing any of its explodey, car-chasey, torture sceney fun.  First, the beginning actually does try to develop the cast of characters so that you’re sympathetic with them instead of wondering why the badass hasn’t shot them for whining so much. These scenes do feel a little rushed and forced when it feels like the director is yelling “Okay, you have 70 seconds to make the daughter character relatable, go!” and “In 110 seconds I want to know that Neeson isn’t a deadbeat dad and used to work for the government, go!” But it’s still more work than most other films even try to put in, so it gets a Morgan Merit Badge for character building above and beyond the call of duty.

Second, there is no central Evil Boss Guy.  From runners to pimps to drug dealers to dirty cops to millionaires, they’re all just pseudo-associated in their involvement with the kidnapping, and it doesn’t feel like Taken is fakin’ (pun!) it by trying to convince us that all the wrong in the world is committed by this one guy and once he’s dead the sun will shine and the unicorns will frolic in the meadows and the puppies will fart rainbows or whatever pretentious super fluffy movie ending it is that we’re supposed to be buying into.

To be fair, Taken does still have a fluffy-squishy movie ending, but do you know why I don’t care? Because Liam Neeson is a Badass, capital B, capital A, capital DASS.  And none of that weak sauce Die Hard 4, Lethal Weapon 4, Indiana Jones 4 bullpucky where the lead complains about how old he is and there’s some scene where the young co-star shows up to symbolically help pass the torch to the next generation.  Screw the next generation, I want to see grizzled old dudes beating the living tar out of guys half their age so I can hold on to some hope of being 1/18th that badass when I’m sitting on the porch in my rocking chair with Bessy, my shotgun, waiting for some poser dumb enough to set foot on my freshly mown lawn.

And that’s exactly what Mr. Mills does, creatively, repeatedly and epicly.  He doesn’t even use a gun for the most part, preferring to just use his mitts to collapse your jugular, snap your limbs off or concave your cojones and only uses a piece to take a quick pot shot before continuing his flying fisticuffs of fury. The punch-kick combo does get a little old near the end when you realize the final fight isn’t anymore actiongasmic than the rest of the film, but it doesn’t spoil your fun. I just wanted a more grisly climactic clash to emphasize how bloody and desperate the uphill struggle has been.  But Neeson is no slouch for action and clearly has put his training as a Jedi master (Star Wars) and giant attack lion (Chronicles of Narnia) to good use.

I wasn’t expecting much from Taken, and I’m not saying that it’s going to herald any kind of revolution in films, action or otherwise, but it is fun.  Really fun.  I was that annoying guy in the theater behind you hooting and hollering for Neeson to shoot more people in the face.  And do you know why?

Because I was quite taken with this movie.

Yes, I am very punny, just say it.