Josephine Yurcaba’s grandmother, Beatrice Brazeau , had a dream that one of her children would visit her native France some day. She was so determined to realize this dream, she named one of her daughters Paris.
Now, after seeing her mother survive breast cancer only to learn that she had developed peritoneal cancer, a disease she continues to fight today, Josephine, a sophomore in English and philosophy, is trying to take her mother to the city of her namesake to fulfill the dreams of three generations.
Paris has a lot to say about dreams. With her limited time remaining, she said her last wish is to see her children never give up on their dreams.
Here’s Beatrice’s dream. Here’s Paris’. Here’s Josephine’s.
Paris Yurcaba was admitted to hospice a week before Easter after experiencing excruciating pain from the tumors in her abdomen. For the past two years, Paris has been fighting cancer that metastasized from her ovaries into her abdominal cavity. During her 10-day stay at the hospital earlier in April, Josephine came to visit for Easter. By that point, doctors took Paris off chemotherapy for fear that the treatment would weaken her already frail immune system. Easter Sunday, Josephine’s father broke the news to her: Paris only had between four and five months left.
“It’s surreal when you hear news like that,” Josephine said. “I had known her time was limited to less than a year when she was on chemo … but when I found out on Easter, I was angry at first, but I realized it was time to do something.”
Paris and Josephine’s father, Yul , have always known their daughter was ambitious. Just like her mother, if Josephine gets an idea in her head, she runs with it, Yul joked.
“Nothing’s impossible for Josephine,” Yul said. “She does what she has to do, and she goes for it.”
When Josephine was talking about her plans to travel the world, Paris mentioned her wish to visit Paris, France.
“It hit me that this would be the last summer that I have with my mom,” Josephine said.
Josephine has been running with this idea, and it has gained momentum quickly thanks to help of several key allies.
A benefactor has pledged to cover flights for the family to go to Paris. Wendy Bierwirth , a nurse practitioner with Student Health Services, has agreed to travel free of charge with the family to France. And Josephine has raised more than $2,000 through an online fundraiser.
She said this is helping her cope at least somewhat with the reality of her mother’s condition.
“Before Easter break, I was just ignoring the facts that my mom was really sick, and that no matter what, she didn’t have more than a year left,” Josephine said. “It finally hit me that the time I am going to have with her for the next few months is going to be really precious, and that there’s not that much of it.”
Paris’ current struggle with cancer dates back to her childhood, when her mother, Beatrice, died of breast-ovarian cancer when Paris was 4 years old. With her family’s history, Paris knew she was at risk. When her insurance agreed to cover mammograms, Paris consistently went to the hospital for examinations twice a year for the most part. But in December of 1998, while she was working as a health insurance outcomes manager for TRICARE in the Department of Army Civilians, a nurse approached her in the hospital in Colorado Springs after Paris had an overdue checkup.
“A woman came down the hall of the hospital, and she had a look in her eye and said, ‘Paris, do you want to come with me for a minute?'” Paris said. “They found a lump on my breast. It was right before the holidays.”
Doctors put Paris on doxorubicin , a chemotherapy nicknamed “red devil,” an aggressive treatment for breast cancer, and after four treatments of chemo and nine surgeries within two years, doctors declared Paris cancer-free.
“Me and Paris were blown away when we found out she was sick,” Yul , her husband, said. “It overwhelmed me. But her recovery was amazing.”
Things had turned around in Paris’ health for the next 10 years, until she started to experience abdominal pains two years ago. Doctors discovered advanced peritoneal cancer after running preliminary tests. A month ago, doctors took Paris off chemo, classifying her cancer as Stage IV-metastasized, the most advanced stage.
“As of now, all I want is quality of life for Paris,” Yul said. “I want her out of pain. We live right around the corner from hospice, and I’ve taken her in there twice to reset her pain pump.”
The tumors, especially those on her diaphragm, have made life unpredictable.
“It’s funny how cancer pain is,” Paris said. “One day, I got a really bad stabbing pain in my diaphragm, just driving along. I said, ‘Oh dear God, what in the hell is that?’ And then, all of a sudden, it went away. It’s on and off, but now it’s on more.”
Seeing her mother’s positive attitude in the face of pain-and the inevitable-Josephine is determined to further work toward her goal to send Paris to Paris. She said it’s her duty as a daughter to do so.
“People tell me what I’m doing is inspiring or admirable,” Josephine said. “When I try to look at myself from the outside, I don’t see it as admirable-because it’s the only logical thing I could think to do for someone I love as much as my mom. She’s the most important person in the world to me, and it wouldn’t be who I am to sit back and let the clock tick.”
Yul never expected that ticking clock to close in so fast. Paris was the first woman he ever thought he could grow old with. The couple met when both were stationed in Incirlik , Turkey- Yul as a Green Beret and Paris as a non-commissioned officer in the Air Force.
“We met right after Desert Storm, and when I left there, I didn’t know if I’d ever see her again,” Yul said. “Before I left there, I told her I could see us growing old together. I never told anyone that.”
Yul dreamed of being with Paris until their 80s or later, but he said he was happy to see her reach 50 in September.
Paris said she couldn’t be prouder as a mother after watching Josephine pour herself into this project while often forgoing sleep to accommodate her studies and work at Technician as Life & Style editor.
“I lay in bed at night, and I want to stay so I can see my kids grow up,” Paris said. “I use my kids for strength a lot, especially Jo. She’s got an incredible spirit.”
Through muffled tears, Paris said Josephine’s effort to go to France goes beyond trying to realize this family dream.
“I know she can take care of herself, and Jo’s proven that,” Paris said. “That’s helped me so much, that when I leave this world, I know my children will have their own spirit and their own life when I’m done. I just want to make sure they don’t give up on their dreams. All my children are definitely the people who have the ability to make their dreams come true, and Jo is the closest of all making sure to that… she knows what she’s doing. I’ll be up there, and I’ll find a way to poke them or prod them to make sure they’re doing what they’re supposed to do.”
Looking back on her life and forward to her remaining days, Paris said she’s glad to have embraced the love she’s received from her family and friends. It’s that same selfless love, according to Josephine and Yul , that will make Paris live on.
“How’s she going to live on? She has stacks of journals and diaries. That’s all that I have to have-my memories,” Yul said. “I guess I have to accept this situation, but I’ll always know that Paris was there and she’s always been taking care of everybody.”
Some of those memories include driving across the U.S ., going to sporting events for their children, enjoying Paris’ legendary Christmas cookies and battling through two bouts of cancer.
Josephine hopes to add a final trip to Paris on that list.
“Working on the project just reminds me of how much I love her and how awful it’s going to be when she does die,” Josephine said. “But I can put those feeling aside in the hopes that this makes her really, really happy. I don’t want to regret this, and I don’t care if we can’t make it. I want to be as selfless for her as she’s been for everyone she’s ever touched.”