No, not Chapel Hill. UNC will freeze over and Roy Williams will fly before I encourage kids to go hang out in Orange County. I’m talking about a hill that’s a great deal closer to our hearts here at N.C. State: Hillsborough Street.

There’s been a great deal of talk about and a little bit of progress toward revitalizing our University’s own college street. Many problems facing Hillsborough have been discussed to death in this and other forums: traffic, marauding bums, parking and such. I’ll not go into those things today; I’d rather talk about the biggest issue facing Hillsborough Street: business!

The problem is that many kids facing the common college dilemma of what they are going to do tonight are choosing to find their answers downtown instead of on the street that supports our school and brings culture to our environment.

Why wouldn’t you want to go out on Hillsborough Street any given evening? Think about all of the excellent options that are so close to home! Today I’m going to talk up some of my favorite Hillsborough locations; let me preface this by explicitly stating that I’m not getting any kickbacks — I’m merely a passionate patron.

First, the Farmhouse is open again. For kids who haven’t ventured there before, the establishment has one of the best atmospheres and one of the coolest and most accepting crowds around town. Pizza and beer at the Farmhouse is an institution for our generation, and the old Cantina is a great new location. The inside still has the same feel as the old place — you’ll definitely recognize the deco — except that now there’s a bar complete with a pretty and smart new bartender (still no liquor license, but I’ve always felt that helps keep out the riffraff, aka thirty-something predatory ex-frat-daddies).

Next, let’s take a look at a timeless Hillsborough location. Mitch’s is the kind of place (or is the place) your parents hung out in during college. I love taking the ‘rents out to lunch at Mitch’s, but what I really like about Mitch’s is that it’s totally the kind of place you can go to with a group of friends any particular night and expect to have a really chill time. Grab a few tables and order a few pitchers; you can’t go wrong.

If Mitch’s is timeless, we can describe East Village as old school. EV has always been a pretty cool place to hang out, except on the occasional night when things get really fratted out. To be perfectly honest, I think they’ve cleaned up a lot since Nelson’s in Cameron Village opened up for late night. If the EV crowd over the last couple years has scared you away, think about giving it a try again; I hear Nelson’s is the place to be, which makes EV a much better place for the rest of us!

I don’t mean to skip over any other Hillsborough hang-outs; there’s something for every night on our school’s street. I’m a big fan of Player’s Retreat, especially on weeknights. The hallmarks of Hillsborough shine through at PR, namely a well-lit and comfortable environment complete with good food and good drinks that won’t break the bank. Pantana Bob’s is quite a party, especially if you and your friends are into penny pitchers and beer pong. Sadlack’s makes a mean sandwich, and if you’re really into the club type atmosphere you could always hit up the Pi bar, which usually has a surprisingly non-sketchy crowd.

So the next time those tools that you roll with want to go to Stool Pigeons, you tell them, “although I don’t particularly like you, I’d rather go somewhere where I can see you and hear what you’re saying; plus I’d rather not pay $Texas for those three Bud Lights” (we’ll assume you have bad taste).

Let’s leave Glenwood South for the crowd to whom it caters: young professionals and the kind of people who would actually buy a round of Jager-bombs in public. Come back home to Hillsborough my fellow college students; let’s hike every night!

Did Ball leave out your favorite local joint? Write in and tell him about it at viewpoint@technicianonline.com. And don’t you dare say Around the Corner, or else Ball will personally find you and drop you off at the next U-House three-kegger.